"2.1 Intimacy and sex are separate things.
"Many people use the words "sex" and "intimacy" interchangeably. However, they are not the same thing. Intimacy means a close, familiar, and usually affectionate personal relationship with self, others, or Higher Power. A person can have friendships or relationships that are intimate but not sexual, and many sex addicts have learned that a person can have sex without being intimate." (An Intimacy and Sexual Avoidance-Focused First Step Guide)
2.2 Intimacy avoidance
Intimacy avoidance refers to "conduct and attitudes that serve to avoid or block sexual, emotional, or spiritual connection with others, ourselves, or our Higher Power. (Intimacy Avoidance Another Aspect of Sex Addiction)
Some may wonder, "How can I be an intimacy avoidant if I have so much sex?"
Whether we were compulsively avoiding sexual thoughts, feelings, or behaviors, or struggling with addictive behaviors such as sexual obsession, trading sex for money or services, or viewing pornography, we were avoiding or blocking emotional or spiritual connection with ourselves or others. Here are a few more examples of the intimacy avoidance aspect of sex addiction.
"In order to avoid emotional closeness, some of us chose anonymous partners, used drugs or alcohol, or hid under the cover of darkness. To deflect sexual attention, we may have dressed in dirty, baggy, or unflattering clothes, protected ourselves by excessive weight gain, or foregone basic hygiene and self-care. For some of us, voyeurism or peeping was a way to keep a wall of secrecy, distance or glass between ourselves and those to whom we were attracted. The glass of the computer screen could be seen as just a new or more sophisticated "window" that provided a similar barrier between others and being known by them.""
Search Mental Health Providers Find Similar Resources