Grief Recovery

Why this resource is helpful:

"Grief (noun)- Definition as defined by Merriam- Webster Dictionary:

Obsolete: grievance
A deep and poignant distress caused by or as if by bereavement
A cause of such suffering
An unfortunate outcome
Mishap, misadventure
Trouble, Annoyance
Annoying or playful criticism
While this definition may be concise and vague the experiences of grief are typically all encompassing, and life changing. The sad truth is we will likely all be touched by the powerful impacts of grief at one point in our life, however many of us will find ourselves greatly unprepared for the power of grief and loss.

What"s up with the stages? Are the stages of grief real?

As always it"s important to remember that everyone experiences grief and loss differently, there is no right, wrong, or one way to experience grief. You may have heard of the "stages of grief" in media or from peers, let"s get into both what the stages are as well as who they apply to.

The Stages of Grieving: In 1969 Elisabeth Kubler-Ross introduced the concept of the "stages of grief" in a book she published on death and dying. Kubler-Ross was a founding researcher of her time, studying a field that not many were interested in, death and dying. While Kubler-Ross"s research is still to this day used in the field and respected work, it has also been miss communicated and misunderstood through the eyes of "pop psychology" and the media.

One of the most common misconceptions of Kubler-Ross"s work is that it applies to everyone experiencing a significant loss in their life. Kubler-Ross"s research and publishing actually applied to a unique population, individuals facing their own death. Following the onset/diagnosis of a terminal illness, Kubler-Ross found that individuals appeared to go through "stages" of accepting and grieving their own death. It is important to note that while many individuals may be able to relate to these stages when they lose someone they love there is no research or supportive evidence that individuals will go through "stages of grief" when they lose someone they love.

The Stages of Grief
As described by Kubler-Ross"s work the stages are as follows:

Denial & Isolation The first stage is described as going numb, shock, and disbelief. This stage is our bodies natural defense to protect us in times of heightened stress and trauma. This stage is present to allow us time to make sense of this new information and changes to our daily expectations and plans. This stage will usually relieve as you are more prepared to accept the current stage and process differing emotions and thoughts related to your death.

Anger The second stage, as denial begins to fade individuals may experience intense emotional responses related to their experiences, understanding of their illness, and potential loss of life. Individuals in this stage may find themselves angry with themselves, their choices, their doctors, their spiritual beliefs, or many other things, as they begin to process through the impacts of their illness on their life and future."

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